Why did the Aggie think the weatherman got the sunny forecast wrong? -The Aggie drove through a car wash

Could you kill a monster just by throwing eggs at him? Of course - he'd be eggs-terminated.

What do you get if you take your computer to an ice rink? A slipped disk.

Did you hear the one about the blonde who thought that "love handles" referred to her ears?

How do Iranians speak on the telephone? Persian-to-Persian (person-to-person).

Woman in bed: Aaagh! Aaagh! A ghost just floated into my room! Ghost: Don't worry, ma'am, I'm just passing through.

How did the hail stone describe it's life? -It really has a lot of ups and downs

A guy noticed that his buddy was troubled and asked what was wrong. "Ohhh, it's my girlfriend." "What's the problem?" "When I asked her if she could learn to love me, she asked me how much I was willing to spend on her education."

How many nurses does it take to change a light bulb? None, they just have a nursing assistant do it. As much as the doctor orders.

Q. Which servant of Jehovah was the most flagrant lawbreaker in the Bible? A. Moses. Because he broke all 10 commandments; at once.