Adam: How did Mummy know you hadn't had a bath? Eve: I forgot to dirty the towel, wet the soap and flood the bathroom.

Three priests were fishing on a boat when they ran out of bait. The first priest got up and walk across the water to get some more bait. After 2 hours they ran out of bait again and the second priest said he would go get more bait...so he got up and walk across the water. After 3 hours of fishing they ran out of bait again and the third priest said he would get more bait. So he stepped out of the boat and went straight to the bottom. The first priest turned to the second priest and asked, "Should we have told him where the rocks were? "

I looked into a blonde's eyes, but all I saw was the back of her head!

Bob is sitting on the ice all day fishing with no luck, not even a nibble. Cold and tired he is about to leave, when a guy walks up cuts a hole in the ice beside him, and starts pulling out fish as fast a he can drop his hook in the water. Bob can't believe it, he yells over " whats your secret?" "woogatkakeptewrwm" he answers back. "what did you say?" replies Bob. The man spits a large ball of worms on the ice and says to Bob, " you have to keep your worms warm".

Doctor, I have a ringing in my ears. Don't answer!

Teacher : In the exam you will be allowed 30 minutes for each question. Pupil : How long for the answer sir !

A city boy was on his first camping trip. He was eating his lunch under a tree when an old-timer came along. 'It smells like rain,' he said to the boy. The city boy replied, 'They said it was lemonade.'

What did the dog use to make his kite? Flypaper.

A blonde was filling out an application form for a job. She promptly filled the columns entitled NAME, AGE, ADDRESS, etc. Then she came to the column: SALARY EXPECTED. ''Yes.''

Q: Why did it take the blonde a whole week to wash three basement windows? A: It took her six days just to dig the holes to put the ladder in.