What did the bee say to the flower ? Hello honey !

Policeman: Why did you stop your car, get out, and yell "coward" at the traffic signal? Motorist: The light just turned yellow.

What do you call an alcoholic dog ? A whino !

Cat: "What did you get him for his birthday?" Dog: "Pant . . . pant!" Cat: "Great . . . he needs a pair of pants!"

First cannibal: Come and have dinner in our but tonight. Second cannibal: What are you having? First cannibal: Hard-boiled legs.

What did one slug say to another who had hit him and rushed off? I'll get you next slime!

What do romantic fish sing to each other? Salmon-chanted evening !

A Skeleton walks into a bar, asks for a beer... and a mop.

A not so rich couple decided to stay at a very exclusive hotel for a night. The manager immediately recognized them for what they are but could not throw them out, instead he decided to be clever. In the morning the couple came to settle the bill and were surprized to find they owe $3000. "How's this? We've only been here one night!" the man was annoyed. "So?", said the manager, "this is a very expensive hotel. We have golf courts, tennis courts, swimming pools, exercise rooms, bars and restaurants, all this is very expensive to keep up." "But we didn't use any of these!" explained the couple. "If you didn't use - that's your problem," came the reply. "In that case, you owe me $2000. You see, my wife is a call girl who charges $5000 a night, so please settle your bill," said the man. "What do you mean?" the manager was taken off guard, "I didn't sleep with your wife!" "If yo u didn't use - that's your problem!"

What happened to the little frog who sat on the telephone? He grew up to be a bellhop!